Back to the beginning…

I have been meaning to write this post for a while but life seems to have been getting in the way recently.

I would like to take you back to where this journey began.

Sorry this is a long one, so hopefully you’re sitting comfortably with a good cuppa!

December 2016.

Age: 25

I had been on the pill for around 10 years, been with my partner (now husband!) for 6 years and living together for nearly 2 years so after many lengthy discussions we decided that I would come off the pill.

At first it wasn’t necessarily to try for a baby, it was because after such a long time on the pill I felt my body needed a break and I always worried that underneath something would be wrong and when it came to TTC it wouldn’t be as straight forward as we would hope.

So for the first couple of months we decided we would use the (controversial) pull out method. I had my pill withdrawal bleed as usual in December 2016, a 47 day cycle taking me to January 2017 and then a 35 day cycle taking me to February/March 2017.

After this is when the problems started.

During my next cycle, right about when AF (Aunt Flo) was due I started suffering terrible pains. Like period pains, but a little different. So bad that sometimes I couldn’t stand for the pain. Thinking this wasn’t normal and because there was no sign of AF arriving I went to the docs. They did urine and blood tests to confirm I wasn’t pregnant then referred me for an ultrasound.

April 2017:

By April when I went for the first ultrasound appointment there had still been no period and the pains would come and go with no pattern.

They sent the results onto my GP and we were called in. The first ultrasound suggested Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) and Endometriosis (Endo). I remember sitting with my partner thinking my world is ending because this means I will never have kids. Sounds dramatic but when I have always known my “vocation” in life is to be a mother, anything that could hinder that was devastating. The doctor informed me that she would refer me to a gynaecologist to discuss things further.

AF arrived after an 80-odd day cycle in May 2017. Little did I know this was the last natural AF I would have for 12 months.

It was around this time we stopped using any form of contraception and thought “we’ll just go with it!”

We got engaged on 12th May 2017 - YAY, I was so excited and could not wait to start planning the big day to the love of my life!! This acted as a good distraction, for the most part!

From there I went to see the gynaecologist for the first time in August 2017.

It was a brief appointment whereby he informed me he didn’t think there was conclusive enough evidence for PCOS and Endo from my first scan so he referred me for another one but this time it was to be an internal to get a better idea of what was going on.

September time I had the scan (worst medical experience of my life so far!) and back we trotted (partner never left me to go to these appointments alone as he knew how much it meant to me) in October 2017 to see the gynaecologist again. By this time I was DESPERATE for my cycles to be sorted. I had only had 1 period between May and October and only because it had been medically induced with a hormone called Nortiserone.

Having looked at my scans in close detail and asked me a series of questions, he decided it was PCOS but (thankfully) there were no signs of Endo. During that appointment he prescribed me my first prescription of Metformin. This is a drug which is primarily used in Diabetics but is used off license/label for PCOS.

He wanted to see me in the new year so again off I trotted still feeling no further forward.

During this time my cycles were so erratic and the pain so bad I missed so much work and was threatened with disciplinary and even dismissal if it continued. Thankfully I had an amazing union rep who attended my “absence review” and basically told them to stick their threats up their arses as I was receiving an ongoing diagnosis which they had clear records of.

On to the new year, 2018.

Age: now 26.

I WAS GETTING MARRIED THIS YEAR. I loved being able to say that.

February 2018:

My appointment arrived and was scheduled for February. I wanted answers on how to improve things but most of all, I wanted to know how this affected my fertility. Having googled and googled and googled I knew it was potentially not going to be an easy journey.

I voiced all of this to the gynaecologist and he explained that unless we were to get my cycles under control then there was going to be very little chance of us ever conceiving naturally. This was such a huge blow to both of us as a family was everything that we wanted together and could not imagine a life without children.

It was decided that to try and get my cycles under “control naturally” I would get a new prescription of Metformin which I would continue for the foreseeable future but also a 3 months supply of Nortiserone to use monthly in the hope that it would kick start my body into doing things naturally.

If we had still not gotten pregnant or my cycles had not come down to a normal range then we were to be referred for the start of the fertility treatment process in August (this month, as I write this, scary!). He “signed us off and we would have to go back to the doctor for the next referral stage, if it got to that.

March 2018:

I used my first month of Nortiserone to induce a bleed and by god this was one hellish AF. I had not had a period since October 2017 so this REALLY took its toll. So bad at one point I rang 111 for advice but thankfully got out the other end alive.

I took another round of Nortiserone in April to induce another period, all the while I was taking my prescribed daily dose of Metformin.

May 2018:

On 7th May (bank holiday) I woke and for some random reason decided to do an OPK (ovulation predictor kit) and my goodness, it was so positive!! I was so chuffed I shouted to my other half and we couldnt believe it! Now we knew this didn’t mean that I was 100% ovulating but with a line so strong and showing so quick I was really hoping I was. Just to be on the safe side though I started my last month supply of Nortiserone for my last induced bleed. We joked that “what if we managed to get pregnant the first time I ovulated?!”

I had my hen night on 12th May and that was amazing!!!

I finished my last day of Nortiserone on Friday 18th May so AF would be due Monday 21st / Tuesday 22nd May.

Darling other half had his stag do on 19th/20th May. On May 19th, to keep myself occupied, myself and 2 bridesmaids went for a fab afternoon tea and spa day.

Then, on 20th May, I woke up and (again!) for some unexplained reason I decided to do a home pregnancy test. Sitting on the toilet minding my own business and then I turn around and BAM, IT WAS POSITIVE!!! So just to be sure I dipped another one, and 2 more of a different brand. Holy Moly, all positive! I called the other half who was still away on his stag do and he couldn’t quite believe it either. He thought it was a dodgy set of tests.

I went out and bought a First Response (FRER) and a ClearBlue digital (CBD), just to be on the safe side.

At home that night we did one FRER and it was an obvious, clear, positive line. EEK!

I wanted to wait until the morning for my first morning wee (FMU) to use the other FRER and CBD as in particular the CBD needs a strong sample and I didn’t want to take any chances.

Never have I been so excited to pee on a stick (POAS) so I barely slept that night!!

Awoke on the Monday morning (21st) and POAS, all 3 came back positive and CBD saying 1-2weeks since conception which was about right.

Due to my PCOS we booked an appointment at the docs straight away and they referred us on to the midwife at 1.30pm that afternoon. Goodness this was happening quick! Thankfully we were both off on leave that day!!

The midwife was lovely and gave me SO much information. I voiced my concerns though that I was terrified bean would not stick. One, because I had “heard” PCOS puts you at a higher rate of miscarriage and because two, my Mum had several miscarriages and a preemie so I was terrified i would be like her. To put my mind at rest she gave me the emergency midwife/early pregnancy unit number.

We discussed the official “booking in” appointment as it was too early to do anything like that on that day; she dated me at approx. 4w & 5 days.

We scheduled our “booking in” for 25th June. We then told her we were getting married on 7th July and going on honeymoon 10th July so would like to fit the 12w scan in before we jetted off, so she made a call and (although they wouldn’t usually do this, but did under the circumstances) scheduled us in for our scan on 9th July.

We had so much to look forward too!!!